February 2012
11 posts
Have you ever met someone that you’ve just felt could be very important to you, but you had to say goodbye before you were able to realize it.
I had to do that last night. I so sincerely hope I see him again…
I really wish I could control my irrational emotions better. It’s getting embarrassing.
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I don’t understand the people who legitimately see themselves as more important than other people. The people who are so wrapped up in themselves and their own lives that other people don’t matter. I’m so tired of encountering people who think they are gods gift to the world and that the sun is shining out of their ass, it’s honestly so tiring having to be civil to these...
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I’m living for myself but I’m still not sure if I’m worth it.
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Emotionally, I am completely alone and it’s so difficult to describe. I wake up without thoughts of other people in my head, I don’t worry about what people are doing, have done, will do. It doesn’t matter, it’s not my life. I’m hoping to eventually build myself up to the point where I can have a normal, mature, happy relationship with someone else, whoever that may...
I have…completely given up on everyone. It’s the most liberating and yet miserable feeling I’ve ever felt.
January 2012
14 posts
I don’t know where this is going but I’m embracing it with very open arms.
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Waiting,
Waiting for the inevitable,
Change shall never stop
Upon the discovery
Of my stagnant soul
It will hesitate
Stagger back a step.
Realization that I,
Am not present
But am a cloud
Of my aging soul.
Time has quickened its pace
For me alone.
Forlorn I remain,
Perpetually waiting
For changes that
Are impossible without me,
Yet I am nowhere to be found.
Lost to myself
Beyond...
“I think you need to just shut the fuck up and get over yourself, that’s...”
I need to feel something meaningful. I feel as though everything up to now has just been so…forced.
Or maybe I’m just not letting anything “real“ happen.
I feel so bipolar right now I don’t know what I’m supposed to think or feel about anything anymore.
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I know that I’ve moved on and no longer hold you in my heart. I know because when I thought of you, I felt nothing but slight sadness. But when I thought of him, those butterflies that I thought had left fluttered in my stomach for a moment.
It’s just a shame I fell for someone who will never, ever adore me back.
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“Wearing the face that she keeps in the jar by the door”
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The people I have met
The things I have done
Have sculpted me into
This person before you
I have no reason
To hate my past
For without those moments
Would I be here?
Memories will come and go
Emotions will fly wildly
Mistakes will be made and regretted
We will learn who we are
Who I am is crazy
Who I am is fear
Who I am is all alone
Sometimes smiling from ear to ear
December 2011
49 posts
I can tell where my destination has moved to
I can’t see how I’m going to get there
There’s someone new waiting for me
But I know they’ll go away
I’m confused by what to do
My feet have taken root
I want this to all go well
Please adore me back
I’m becoming increasingly paranoid. It’s slightly worrying.
I don’t know where to begin when trying to get my mind to comprehend this situation.
I need to get out of my own head and into someone else’s pants.
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If only you knew
I remember this time last year you were slowly becoming my world. My Christmas last year was weird, I was in a strange place emotionally and my family was having a hard time coping with their current life situation. The only thing that helped me smile during my Christmas Eve night at the grandmothers house was messaging you every minute of the night…I believe it was on this night that I...
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Get under my skin
And call me your sin
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My life was complicated by you and your existence.